Tagged

I had to get a new tag for the broadcast on Saturday. It's kind of silly since we just got released last Sunday. I explored a few options with Sister Ellis, wife of the executive secretary at the MTC, and this seemed like the best one. We are not allowed to use the plastic clip above the tag on the left as the metal parts could reflect the bright lights and cause a glare. The pin on the back failed about 6 months in to our service at the MTC (3 1/2 years ago) - it would not stay closed and as a result my tag kept falling off. I finally super glued it shut and I haven't given it a second thought until now. So, even though I'm "retired", they ordered me a new magnetic tag. When I got my first tag I was just a bit disappointed that it did not say, "The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day-Saints", but I still loved it. When I looked at my new tag today, I was sad to see that tag said nothing but my name (I was happy that they spelled my name right). There were a few other sisters with tag issues, so they rushed them through and all the brand new tags were like mine... name only.

The tag on the left will always remind me of an incredible four years of learning and growth as we've been blessed to serve with the missionaries at the MTC. It's a bit dull and the lettering is not at white as it was the day I got it. But then, I'm not the same person either. I have learned so much about faith and trusting God as we move forward - not always knowing what the outcome will be. I have been humbled as I learn about the sacrifice of some of the missionaries and the struggles they have been through even at their tender ages. Serving at the MTC involves a lot of repetition. I now look at repetition not as something to be endured but as an opportunity to have something written deeply on my heart.

This new tag will only be worn once - tomorrow. But I think I will find a home for it, next to my old one where I can see it and reflect on what it means to me. A new beginning, a fresh start - lots of space for me to write my future - and to remind me of my desire to have a tag with "The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day-Saints" inscribed below my name.

The last verse of the congregational hymn we will sing mid conference tomorrow says it best:

"There's surely somewhere a lowly place in earth's harvest fields so wide 

Where I may labor though life's short day for Jesus the Crucified.

 So trusting my all to thy tender care and knowing thou lovest me, 

I'll do thy will with a heart sincere: I'll be what you want me to be."

PS Second Alto's (that's me) will be in the right quarter of the choir seats.

We will line up by height and then rearrange a bit to mix the colors, 

so I'm guessing I will be mid to lower part of that section. 

I'll be wearing turquoise!

Life Marches On

Twenty Thirteen.

I think it was when we were driving to St. George from Amy's house in Roseville (CA) that the conversation turned to the events this year would hold for our family:

Twenty Thirteen promises to be full of change:

big changes for me.

Jennifer will graduate from High School - my baby.

My baby who has become an amazing, beautiful woman and a dear friend.

     -No more children in public schools.

Jennifer will spend three weeks in Germany on an school organized exchange.
    - I realize that she will be 18, but my baby will be in a foreign country.
    - Mark and I will have three straight weeks to ourselves.

Exciting, different, a little taste of things to come. Three weeks is long enough to do something fun, something productive - and not quite long enough to feel lost.

Christian will return home from his mission
     -Can I really be the mother of three returned missionaries?
Ruby will start Kindergarten
Jennifer will start College

I'm getting old. 

Christian and Jennifer will move out and attend BYU.
    - Which means I retire from full time mothering...

This is the big one. 

The first twenty years of my life I looked forward and prepared to be a mother. 

It was the desire of my heart. 

The next almost thirty years I have spent enveloped in the lives of my family,

most especially my children.

This is a great blessing I have been given from my Father in Heaven

as well as my amazing husband, as he has also made it possible,

not only to have them, but for mothering and nurturing to be my full time job.

I look forward to having having a freedom we have not had for many years.

But, he will go to work and while I will have Kindermusik,

for the first time in a long time, 

no one will come through the door in the middle of the day

ready for a snack and some chatter about their day.

I will miss that. 

The house will be very quiet most of the day,

which isn't that different than it is now,

 but it will feel more empty.

I guess that's why they call it an empty nest.

Mark will be released from the MTC.

   -Which means he will have an extra 16+ hours a week.

   -We may actually get to sit together in church.

   - We will miss the great blessing of associating with the incredible Elders and Sisters at the MTC.

And then, last but not least on 11-13 of 2013, I will turn 50.

   - Not a bit deal really. But I guess a lot of it depends on the things that happen earlier in the year.

Twenty thirteen promises to be full of change, probably summed up by a fortune cookie: 

"Your path may be difficult but it will be rewarding."

Ready or not, here it comes...

Flashback Friday: Patience

Last Saturday evening Mark was finishing up his talk for the MTC. He speaks about every month and every third time he speaks I speak with him for about 5 minutes. (Not long I realize but in some ways it's more of a challenge to give a meaningful talk on only 5 min.) This was his second talk since I last spoke with him so I asked him when I was speaking with him next. (This is totally beside my post but, he turned to me with a confused look and said, "Didn't I tell you that you're speaking tomorrow?" Ha ha ha, funny guy:) So... he looked at the calendar, April 18... no wait... that's Rob's homecoming... a phone call later and we were rescheduled to speak on April 11 - on patience.

PATIENCE.


The last time we were assigned to speak on patience was about two months after my bike crash. Although the ER doctors told me I would be back to normal in 6 weeks they were wrong... very very wrong. Patience was a good topic for me to study and prepare a talk on...only it turned out that the district president and his wife were speaking that Sunday so we got bumped and assigned a different topic. All in all I was thankful for what I learned in preparing the talk.

Within a month of this we were reassigned to a French Branch. One of the sisters was preparing to leave for Fiji in a few weeks but was having problems with her neck. The leftovers from a car accident that had happened over two years ago. (TWO YEARS??????? I was horrified) Her neck bothered her to the extent that they were not sure they were going to send her to Fiji... or anywhere but home. Then her Aunt suggested she see someone that had previously helped her recover from an injury, Angela Lavery. Two visits and this sister felt better that she had since the accident and was on her way to Fiji. I got Angela's name and phone number but for some reason I didn't call her. I was making progress on my own, working with physical therapist, chiropractor, getting massages, stretching and exercising. I was sure I would be back to normal very soon.

I have been feeling very good lately but my back has still been tight and I haven't been able to find a way to fix it. So... about two weeks ago I called Angela and left her a detailed message. Last Monday she texted me, told me she didn't have any open appointments till April and asked me if I was flexible and wanted to be put on her cancellation list. I told her I would be more flexible towards the end of the week but to put me on her list.

Wednesday morning, as I was getting up, I stretched...

not like this:

more like this:

picture from here
suddenly the left side of my neck and left shoulder were in terrible pain. I couldn't turn my head to the left at all and I couldn't get out of bed without sending spasms of pain through my neck and shoulder. It felt like the days after the crash all over again. After gasping a few times in pain as I attempted to get out of bed I laid back down and cried. Mark quickly roused and after assessing the situation he resisted the urge to cry with me but instead, gave me a blessing of hope and healing.

For just a moment during the blessing I was without pain - a promise of things to come I'm sure. I guess there's more for me to learn about patience. I got up, dried my face, very gingerly put on my robe and when down to make breakfast.

I also texted Angela.
Turns out she just had a cancellation that afternoon for 3:30. I took it.
By the time 3:30 rolled around I was really hurting AND my right shoulder was a few inches above the left one, my head tilting towards it. I couldn't look to the left without turning my whole body.
Angela worked on me for almost 2 hours.
Massage, pressure point therapy, acupuncture, stretching.
She gave me some homework to do and we talked about the accident and my aches and pains since then. She pinpointed a few aches and pains that I though were unrelated and she explained how they contributed to what what happening.
Leaving that appointment I smelled like Mentholatum and felt 60% better.
Yesterday I continued to get better.
I stretched and worked on the pressure points she showed me and continued to increase range of motion in my neck and decrease pain.

Today I am continuing to improve. I hope that with another visit or two we can treat the underlying problems from my accident and I can be 100%.
One Hundred Percent.
Back to normal after 6+ months...
even the thought of it gives me great hope

But it will take patience and work.
Time to study up again and get ready for my talk.
and do my homework from Angela.