Dear Family,
It seems as though in our moments of happiness and success the Lord sees fit to throw us into a difficult situation.
This week has been one of the hardest in the mission for me!
The first two days passed with nothing but rejection. We have been having a hard time getting the members to think like missionaries and prepare the people in their lives to be taught (because they are feeling like they have already tried sharing the gospel with everyone). Also, the people here in Santo Ângelo have really hardened their hearts.
Then, after the second or third day my companion told me that he didn't have a testimony! I thought that he was just discouraged and assured him that that is exactly what Satan wants to happen. So, he explained more; For six years he has been trying to gain a testimony. He has prayed and really put his heart on the line. Then, he didn't feel like he gained a testimony and hardened his heart. He is very intelligent and says that feelings can easily be manipulated. He has been having a lot of difficulties and has already made the decision to go home. As much as I have tried to help him he has hardened his heart and always has a "logical" explanation for everything.
Don't get me wrong. I know that he was placed with me because I have a TESTIMONY that I can't neglect. I'm doing all that I can and hopefully it will be enough.
He needs your prayers!
The only catch is that he is one of my favorite companions! He is very smart, he doesn't fight about anything. The reason he is still on the mission is that he wants to have the best family he can; a wife that has the same standards as him, with unity and love. He knows that the best family that he can have will be in the church. But, now he is noticing how when he teaches he doesn't have the spirit. Neither can he teach something that he doesn't believe.
Yeah, it's complicated.
Sorry for the headache, but, that's been my week!
Don't worry about me, nothing can take away my testimony. But, I challenge each and every one of you to get on your knees tonight and pray for the Lord to give you a stronger testimony! Also, pray for Elder Borlot! He needs your help!
Thanks for your letters! I need them.
2 comments:
Karen, I love the post about statistics, brought back lots of memories. I am so glad that class is over, you can do it! hang in there!
A thought for Robbie...I can identify with his companion...it's important for his friend to know that often a testimony consists of the very fact that he knows his greatest chance at happiness will be by living the gospel...even if he doesn't know yet that every aspect of the church is true. He has to understand that it is okay to not have a 'burning' testimony....that what he does have may be enough, because it reflects what he desires to be true.
The peace can come precept upon precept and a recognition that the gospel in its purity is the order of God's world and making sure he can separate that from challenges with individuals or even church leadership from time to time.
His knowledge doesn't have to be perfect & it is far healthier for him to be able to talk about his doubts than bury them and pretend. I wish him the best and am so happy for Robbie that he is learning so very much to sustain him in his life.
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