Thanksgiving Came Early This Year

It came in a Mazda from California.

When Amy was expecting our first grandchild a friend told me a little of what I could expect. "Grandkids are like a part of you and when you are with them you feel so much joy and when they leave it's like a part of you is missing, a literal heart ache you miss them so much."

I feel the same way. Last night, after our early Thanksgiving feast, Ruby and I played balls in the basement and Grandpa soon joined us. Peter and I climbed up the stairs over and over and over again to his delight. I stuck out my tongue "ble blur ble blur ble blur" over and over and he would smile brightly and do the same back. He would gently tip his head onto my cheek giving me loves. Then we read books, Jenn read with Peter and I read with Ruby. Long after Peter moved on to other things Ruby and I were still going strong. Seven board books and then seven longer books. I could have read all night. As she snuggled in my lap and soaked up the stories, I soaked up the moment. The weight of her in my lap, the softness of her hair on my cheek, her sweet smell... and her comments, giggles and smiles as we read. Memorizing every detail so that after she left this morning, the memory could help fill the missing space in my heart. Soon it was time for bed. Amy read the last book to Ruby, Caps for sale! Ruby knew every word and detail. Amy read, shaking her finger, 

picture credit

"You monkeys, you...give me back my caps. But the monkeys only shook their fingers back at him and said..." Then Ruby would shake her finger and say, "Tsz, tsz, tsz.". 

These are such a loved children. I could see, and had seen all week, the difference that it makes to a child to have a mother who is willing to be there for them each and every day and to have a father who wants the same thing. Some of our (adult) conversation this week was about the challenges of raising children in the world we live in. Where moral values are skewed or absent and what's popular is often mistaken for what's most  important. In Kindermusik this week we talked about the importance of children having a secure base and how that helps them have the courage and security to explore the world and eventually become independent. 

I am so thankful for children and their spouses and so many others who are sacrificing and working hard to give their children a good foundation in life. Young adults who often live a less than glamorous life, in the trenches each day nurturing, providing and protecting this most precious resource for what ails the world, our children.

Children grow up so quickly. 

These moments are fleeting. 

The time and love given by their parents each day really do make all the difference.

Despite all the challenges in the world, 

I can see hope in our future.

Feast and Famine...

This morning I spent 45 minutes in a room full of energetic two-year-olds. 

Even though I've taught this same lesson twice already this week, this particular group wanted to be up and moving... all the time...so that's what we did, we had most of our class on our feet. It was fun and challenging and caused me to think deeply and creatively to adapt the lesson plan to the needs of these little ones in the moment.

 And then, the last tiny pair of sandals was filled and gone and my house was calm. 

Completely quiet.

Silent and very still. 

I took a breath and looked around.

 It felt good. 

I love my life. 

I have lists of things that need doing but not sure what I wanted to do. 

Check out pinterest, check my email, make lunch, finish the laundry... 

Really what I wanted to do was to play with my grandchildren, have lunch with their parents, especially their mothers - telling them again how amazing they are and to remind them that while it may seem that the things they do day after day after day are mundane and repetitive... they are doing the most important things they could be doing... ever. All those little things count, the spilled cheerios, the smears on mom's shirt, the endless laundry, all the little hassles and issues that seem as though life would be so much easier to just give in, just this morning... but you don't. What you are doing is building people,



one moment at a time. And before you know it these moments will have added up to years and decades and you will marvel                                                      

that the child once laying on the floor kicking and screaming now has a child of their own... doing exactly the same thing. And what you desire now... a clean house and 15 minutes of quiet calm that you can choose to do anything you like... will be yours.

And there may be days when you long for someone to come over and fill your home with noise, spill  cheerios on the floor, get your shirt a little soiled and put their sweet chubby arms around your neck.

Funny how that goes.

 Feast and famine... but really it's all feasting.

                 Life is good.

and it's time to get back to my list.

Always lists

Thank goodness.

Crowning Day

As I write the lower left quadrant of my mouth is numb. I may or may not be drooling. This afternoon I got two permanent crowns - after two weeks of an aching jaw with my temporaries... 

Lets hope I will not be needing Alleve very soon. 

Today I also finished up my first semester of Kindermusik.

I learned so much.

I must admit that I was a little surprised at how attached I got to the children in my classes.

Little ones grow and change so much in a few short months. 

At first they were a little wary of me and now they smile big as they sit in my lap.

They have learned that when a song is over we put the instruments or scarves away, 

sometimes they begin singing the clean up song before I do.

Even if they are enjoying what we are doing they trust that whatever is coming next will be just as fun. They are learning that everyone pausing together can be just as much fun and playing together.

They are learning to take turns.

They have so much enthusiasm and energy

and delight over simple things

like a box of kleenex.

Who knew.

I'm looking forward to next semester beginning

after spending some time playing with my Ruby girl 

and getting to meeting her little brother... when he arrives.

If I could have Ruby, Olivia and Peter in my classes that would be ideal

but I can't complain

I have a really good life.

What I've been up to...

busy with life

having a blast with kindermusik

getting ready for Erika* to come

and while Mark was out of town for a week I took on a few projects

OK a few too many projects

but here are some I finished:

 Made two of these for the living room, 

same fabric, different birdy placement

 Dresser for Jenn's room

used to be a plain, cheap pine dresser

 painted and stenciled - some new knobs

Gutted and set up Jenn's closet.

*more about Erika soon.

I finished my training!

 {picture credit}

Jump up, do a little dance,

and go here for a chance to get $50.00 off Kindermusik tuition.

That is all.

Carry on

I'm no Miss Julee

WARNING - this is another Kindermusik post, if you've had enough feel free to skip it, 

but it's what's going in my life right now.

{this is Miss Julee with Carol Penney - one of the head honchos at Kindermusik}

(Julee, I got this from facebook - I can take it off if you want me to, does that count as getting permission? ;)

I had three classes today. 

Yesterday, after talking with Miss Julee, I discovered that I had scheduled them too closely (and now I wonder if I had too many too). I couldn't get the music to load on to the ipod yesterday, or today and finally gave up after wasting precious prep time fussing with it. 

I had a good turn out and many people brought friends. 

I began feeling calm and completely able, getting to know the moms and their children, answering questions and singing the songs with confidence but as one group left and another came I knew I was on a tight schedule and was not able to answer questions as well or greet the parents and children as well as I would have liked. After the last class, as the last mom was about to leave she turned to me and said, "You need to have more passion for the children.... and get a gate for the stairs, that's what Miss Julee did." It stung a little but the reality is that she was exactly right and I appreciated her honesty and candor. It must not have been too bad though because she still signed up for class 

(even though I wasn't able to make change for her deposit).

I survived the morning and I realized that I have a lot to learn

(which I already knew in my head, but the rest of me was just shocked at the reality). 

I felt a little like crying, but not enough to need to reapply my mascara.

Next I wanted to drown my disappointment in
a three scoop gelato at Costco

(Costco was on my to do list right after I took Jenn her running clothes)

- but really all that would do is give me a stomach ache
and then I'd feel worse. 

I decided instead to indulge in half of a nuts about berries salad at Zuppas along with a half serving of garden vegetable soup (I can only get lobster bisque when I'm with Amy and Jenn and yes, I ate the chocolate covered strawberry first).  Without a growling stomach I could think about this more logically. While I could have done better, I didn't totally flop and people still signed up. So it was a success in some ways. I hoped I'd bee as good as Miss Julee but really, how could I be, she has been doing this for so many years and is totally amazing - still, with all the plans and prep I thought it would have been better than it was. I was really glad to have Miss Julee there to help out and making sure I got the right child in the right class - which almost happened. I did charged a few people the wrong amount but always in their favor.

While I'm no Miss Julee I also realize that she's no Miss Karen.

I'm not sure exactly what that means but I'm willing to continue to work and prepare and find out. 

Miss Julee believes in me (I hope she still does), the moms believe in me enough me to sign up...

I CAN do this. 

But right now I'm going to take a nap.

Sorry for the lack of pictures, while I had the camera ready and was planning to take pictures the batteries were dead.

Deciding to do Kindermusik part 2

While all of these feelings were swirling around, my neighbor and friend approached me and told me she was thinking about not teaching Kindermusik any more. She has taught for 13ish years and has been heavily involved in the training program for new teachers for the last few years - which has become a full time job. I talked with her last year as I considered teaching Kindermusik, but decided that there was no way I could get my own program going with her amazing one literally across the street. She said that one thing that kept her from retiring from the classroom is that she had no one to send her students to... 

(que heavenly music).

The rest has been like a dream... 

 

you know, one of those dreams where everything around you is moving quickly and you are stuck in slow motion - well sort of. The training can take up to 4 months, but I will finish mine this Thursday after 6 weeks - and this with a trip to Lake Tahoe, a short jaunt to Sacramento/San Francisco, a week in Park City, the boys moving out, Jenn and Mark starting school and texturing, painting and recarpeting the basement... 

(whew, deep breath, in and out, in and out). 

and you wonder why I haven't been blogging

While it has been a little (OK maybe more than a little) crazy around here, things are coming together, classes are filling up and teaching is

SO MUCH FUN!!!!

the moms and kids are so cute and it's just perfect for me. I am so excited about this new venture in my life. Now I just need to figure out how to cook for three.

and what to do with all this extra milk.