Wednesday, September 23, 2009

Tighten it up or let it go?

I was talking to a friend the other day and was able to identify a period of about 5 months in my life where I was organized and felt on top of things.

It was in 1987; from the time we moved into our West Jordan house until Robbie was born. I had a cleaning schedule that I stuck to like glue. Aaron and Amy were small and would "help" me each morning. I had beautiful plants that we would water and trim on a regular basis. I had a meal schedule that I used to create my weekly grocery list and it seems that I rarely had food that was wasted. We went for walks and planted flowers. We played on the swings...

I find myself often trying to recreate those 5 months. I have only two children home now who are older and more self sufficient... it seems like it should be a no brainer yet I struggle.

I put together a cleaning schedule for myself. Determined to get my laundry going early this morning I came down with my sheets and full hamper to find a full washing machine and this note:
Hmmmm this would put me behind schedule... but complain about a 17 year old doing his own laundry... I think not. (Well, mostly doing his own laundry).

Just when I feel like I've got a good routine down things change:
-Running with Jenn when she has to miss x-country because of piano lessons = skipping aerobics and reshuffling the morning.
-Eating dinners later in the evening so family members can take advantage of the last few weeks of warm evening light.
-Running around trying to get all the stuff put together so we can rent the house we just bought in St. George.
-Contemplating the changes Marks' new calling at the MTC (branch presidency) will mean for our family (I am not officially called but it is requested that I attend with him as often as possible (Sundays, Tuesday evenings and possibly Thursday evenings) hoping all the time that I can still serve with the Young Women Sunday and Wednesdays...

Honestly I wouldn't change any of these things.
I feel so blessed by all of them.
I just seem to always have a nagging feeling that there is a host of things I'm letting slide that I shouldn't... and then there's always trying to figure out what's for dinner...

Some how I thought it would be easier when my children got older, or when I finished school, or ... well, I don't know what. When will I have time to write... or read books for pleasure... I keep feeling that if I just got better organized I could make time for these things. Maybe things will settle down in a few weeks.

But then again... maybe not.


Grandma T. said...

Could your dilemma be called LIFE? In my limited experience it never changes as long as one is flexible enough to take advantage of your family's needs (and/or the opportunity to share special experiences with them.) And it sounds like you're doing the right things in EVERY instance. Just look at the evidence -- your adult and preadult kids as well as your husband!! Keep it up, RELAX and ENJOY!! XOXOXOXO

The Fifes said...

there's no hope for me then. ;)

celisamz said...

Just wanted to let you know that I think you are amazing! Numerous talents and interests (and people that you help to learn and grow) translates into several demands on your time. In my opinion, you are pretty much Superwoman. ;)

Christie said...

This post really hit home for me...I am SO familiar with that feeling! I'm down to only ONE child at home and yet the hither and thither and unexpected are still the expected. I suppose it really will change next year when she is away at college...but I know then, even if I am more "organized" there will be a sadness to it that will never go away.